Funnies: Week of 08-31-03

You know the drill Bravo Company...time to catch up on some of the whacky and crazy stuff that happened throughout the week.

1st Article- After this guy robs a bank, the bomb strapped to his chest goes off (http://www.pennlive.com/newsflash/pa/index.ssf?/base/news-6/10621163504750.xml). Talk about backfiring on ya

2nd Article- Prisoner's aren't listenin to ya? Well do like these two correction officers and throw a lighted firecracker into the jail cell. (http://www.reviewjournal.com/lvrj_home/2003/Aug-28-Thu-2003/news/22033729.html)

3rd Article- Up for an interesting story? How about this story about a fair employee (http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story2&u=/ap/20030827/ap_on_fe_st/fair_stripper&e=4) getting fired from smoking from a glass pipe, then stealing money from another employee, and then exposed himself in a womens restroom. And guess how this story ends? He got hit by a train!

4th Article- Ever think of stripping being a dangerous job? Well watch out for this ladywho attacked the stripper for failing to meet expectations. (http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=816&ncid=816&e=1&u=/ap/20030826/ap_on_fe_st/stripper_attacked)

5th Article- Remember that on-line Rubik's cube thing I posted awhile back? Well check out this guy who solved the rubik's cube in 20 secs! (http://www.cbc.ca/stories/2003/08/24/cube030824) Meanwhile, there are very lil things I can accomplish in 20 secs...

And of course, a section for the things that can't fit into particular category :)

1st Random thing- Think your Gameboy Advance is cool? Well I bet it can't beat this Gameboy ######ed Hand Held Thingy! (http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3027004436&category=3579) Looks like something Special Ed would use ;)

2nd Random thing- Time for important information. Educate yourselves on the facts of farts (http://www.heptune.com/farts.html) See, you can always learn something new in the weekly funnies!

3rd Random thing- Ever wonder what you would get when you crossed the Stay Puff Marshmellow man, Richard Simmons, and Fat Albert? Yeah, I never thought about it either. But now you can check it out! (http://cloud.prohosting.com/nioj/staypuff.htm)

alright...I lied... :P

The bride said she wanted three children, while the young husband said two would be enough for him.

They discussed this discrepancy for a few minutes until the husband thought he'd put an end to things by saying boldly, "After our second child, I'll just have a vasectomy."

Without a moments hesitation, the bride retorted, "Well, I hope you'll love the third one just as if it's your own."

Well with all this talk about the VMA's...time to post highlights on Chris Rocks laughs and jokes that night. Here's part I:

On MTV's shows
"Everytime I see ?Say What Karaoke.? I say 'Say what?s on the other channel.'"

On 'Making the Band' with Puff Daddy
"You get to see Puff Daddy be a mentor to the children. Who better than Puff Daddy to show the kids wrong from wronger?"

On 'Punk'd'
"I want to see them try to punk DMX. ?DMX, you?ve been punked.? ?Oh yeah, you?ve been stabbed.?"

On Ashton Kutcher
"My man?s a pimp. He?ll take your girlfriend and your mother. I don?t even think he?s in love with Demi Moore. He?s just trying to punk Bruce Willis."

On Seeing Janet Jackson with Jermaine Dupree
"Man, I had a shot. It?s like finding out about a sale a day too late."

Check this out...

sorta the same picture..but...Justin Timberlake...OWNED!!! ( http://members.bellatlantic.net/~vze4494h/justin-owned.jpg)

Quiz: Are you a Real Man? ( http://home.tiac.net/~cri/1998/realmen.html)